Wednesday, January 8, 2014

Pants... Or Superpower?

So, in response to yesterday's post as seen here, this is why my fifth January Mini Monthly goal is to wear pants on the weekends:

The power of pants, such a simple thing, and yet it is awesome. I have discovered in pants the power to kick laziness' big slothful but and run full steam into productive overdrive.

Note: it doesn't actually have to be pants per se, skirts and dresses work just fine too. So long as it is real people clothes in order to go out and be a part of the real people world on the weekends. Otherwise the laze-monster wins! And no one wants that.

However, there will be times that I will make exception to the pants rule, on pre-determined "lazy days" and of course, on sick days.

But Jessica, why are you SCHEDULING time to be lazy? Shouldn't that just happen magically and organically? Sure. The same way being productive and actually completing that massive weekend to-do list just happens "magically."

I have a confession dear reader, something that I have long-harbored but know that I must impart it unto you if we are truly going to have the kind of long-lasting friendship I hope we'll see...much like Bruce Banner holding back the burden, my curse...I'm always lazy.

And so, in order to keep that monster in check, I've gotta feed it once in awhile. With frequent naps and books. It really likes books. However, I can't just let the monster have free reign all the time, otherwise I'd never be able to hold down a successful job...or two, and a full-time course load, take care of a dog, and cook and clean for myself...whew I'm winded just typing that. So I've discovered that the only way to keep this lazy beast relatively contained and satiated, is by scheduling regular breaks and down time throughout my month. Do you do this dear reader? I bet you do, if not. You should.

Now what does this all have to do with pants? Super-powered pants. Well, on those non-lazy days, the days when I hope to be productive and a functioning and contributing member of humanity, I need to do something that will cage the monster and bend it to my will.

I figured this out after talking with Fiance one day about the importance of habits and routine. You see, Fiance is very good at being productive on his off days, he cooks and cleans and is pretty much perfect. But HOW?! How does he achieve this feat?

He wears contacts. That's his "hero mask" if you will. (Go ahead, imagine Clark Kent taking off the glasses to become Superman. I'll wait.)
Ok so let me explain. During the course of his normal morning routine; you know the brushing, washing, what have you. He always finishes with the contacts last. And he says that once the contacts go in, it's like a switch flips in his brain and he knows that it's time to start the day. Otherwise, on his lazy days, when he leaves the glasses on he never fully wakes up or "charges" and so he just kind of bums around all day. (Note: this doesn't happen often as he doesn't get much down time with his current job.)

Weird. But true.

Well, here's my conundrum. I don't wear contacts, nor do I wear glasses. Yay vision! But I still needed something to serve as my own catalyst into productivity. I searched for that special thing, that perfect cap to the morning routine. But I don't really have a routine. Not like Fiance. When I wake up things just kind of happen in whatever order they end up happening in. Teeth, bathroom, face, feed/walk dog, coffee. And even coffee, my beloved sweet nectar from the heavens doesn't save me. Mainly because I can still be lazy and drink coffee...laze-monster also loves coffee.

Anywho, so what could it be? Well I just recently figured it out you guys. (Buried lead NOW!)


I know crazy right? Well I figured since I normally wear pants to work, it's one of the last things I do before leaving and is definitely a symbol to Get. SH*T. Done. So maybe pants? Because, I'll tell ya some weekends who cares right? But not anymore, pants are going on Saturday morning and not coming off until...well probably Saturday night but anyway...

I know this works too because I tested my theory last Sunday. The one right before going back to work after the holidays, when I didn't want to do ANYTHING but I still had stuff I could kinda get done...if I were so inclined. And here's what happened thanks to the power of pants:

- Cleaned the kitchen
- made coffee (a must)
- walked the dog
- rearranged the living room! (Yes, by myself too)
- swept and mopped the floors
- started THIS blog!
- took out the trash
- ordered prints
- went shopping and bought everything and only things on my list
- made dinner for myself and a friend
- cleaned the kitchen AGAIN (for those that know me, this is a feat)

 Quite the list right? Pants are magical. I think that's why men stopped wearing togas and kept women in dresses for so long...maybe...

So readers, do you have a catalyst that jumpstarts your morning? I'd love to hear what it is!

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