Monday Meditation #3: What's standing in your way?

What would you do if there was nothing standing in your way? Nothing holding you back?

Why is it that sometimes when we have dreams, big plans for life, we never actually take the proper steps to follow through on them? Why do these dreams stay dreams, hidden in the secret places of our hearts? Perhaps written hopefully in a journal, to serve as a constant reminder of what might be, the could be of that dream life.

There are a number of excuses that we tell ourselves day in and day out that make us believe that these dreams are unattainable; that they're too grand, to "out there" or just impractical. Unfortunately, that's sometimes true (like my childhood dream of being a wizard...though I guess if some girls can become mermaids...) But for the most part, many of these dreams ARE achievable, it's just a matter of shifting your thinking, of looking past the obstacles standing in your way.

But what if there were no obstacles? What if there was nothing blocking your path to that dream life?

Would you be doing things differently?

Would you wake up earlier? Start your mornings off with yoga, thoughtful meditation and a cup of tea instead of a hulk-sized mug of coffee and a frantic rush out the door? Would you make time for art and creativity and allow yourself to feel whole and fulfilled, knowing that you're spending each day doing a little something to reach that dream, to make it real?

Thanks to the Internet, there's almost no excuse to keep those dreams hidden. And if you fail? That's okay too. We need to start embracing failure just as much as success. Failure is just another chance to learn and grow, and still a step towards that dream. At least you're trying.

True failure is not even making that first move.

Monday Meditation

I've been thinking a lot about anxieties and my own crippling self doubt. Particularly with starting this blog. It's difficult to put yourself out there and try to come up with new and interesting content that you hope people will see and read and want to engage with you about.

It's even more difficult to then tell people you know, friends and family that you've done this thing. That you hope they'll see and read these things you've written, that they'll support you in this endeavor.

The thing about anxiety is, it doesn't make sense. They're even more useless fears than regular fears (like being afraid of snakes, planes or snakes on planes.) With anxiety you're afraid of the "could-be's" and the "what-ifs." The likelihood of these fears coming to pass are slim to none. That doesn't make them any less terrifying, that doesn't make them go away.

And people who don't suffer from anxiety just don't get it. They say "just don't worry about it." or "Why are you freaking out about this thing that you have no control over anyway?"

                                           "Think about rainbows, rainbows are nice..."

Because freaking out gives me a measure of control, I feel like if for some reason, the worst scenario actually DOES come to pass, hell even if there is nothing I can do about it, well at least I knew it was coming.

I've been afraid of starting this blog for so long now. Because I was afraid that I would have nothing to say, or that what I did have to say no one would want to hear (or read). I've been most afraid of being judged (for what I have to say, and most importantly how I say it...I worry about my grammar a lot).

But I've just decided to remind myself everyday that in the end, it doesn't really matter what anyone else thinks. This is something that I want to do and have wanted to do for so long. I have thoughts and ideas that I want to share with the world, even if the world chooses to ignore me. At least I'm going to try and get my ideas and my stories and my words out there.

And if people choose to comment on my bad grammar, well that's just a chance for me to learn better grammar.